Today as I was reading the account of the woman who anointed Jesus and His response about her, I had this thought: Jesus makes the point that people who have experienced forgiveness from many sins will love Him more than those who've only experienced a little forgiveness. So that begs the question: Is it better for me to have sinned a lot so I can experience lots of forgiveness? Is that how I can increase my love for God? But for anyone to even ask that question proves that they don't understand their own sinfulness. You don't have to sin a lot to experience more forgiveness and therefore experience more love for Jesus. I don't know a single person who hasn't sinned multiple times every single day they've been alive. I don't know what the definition of "sinning a lot" is but my guess is...I qualify. To experience an increase in my love for Jesus doesn't require that I seek out more ways to sin or that I engage in so-called worse sins than I have before. I don't need a shady past to love Jesus. I just need a healthy perspective of me. I need to understand that I am that woman at Jesus' feet. I am the one who has sinned much. When I forget who I am, no wonder my love for Him decreases. But when my true condition is always before me. When I can constantly see myself for who I really am, that's when my love for Him is strongest. Because seeing myself clearly (a sinner in desperate need of saving) means that I have to see Him more clearly (the one and only Savior) or else I have no hope. And that makes me love Him even more.
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